Shaykitteh's World of Books

This book was randomly sent to me by the author with no email follow-up or request, but I'm assuming she wants a review. Unfortunately, this is not the review that she probably will want, but it's honest and hopefully she'll take this information as constructive criticism.

NOTE (to the author): It is generally recommended to ASK a reviewer if they are willing to read your book instead of just sending it to them, especially without a request to review. Next time, please take the polite approach and ask if a reviewer is able to review the book before sending it.

First one all, what strikes me is the length of this book. It is WAY too long for the story that the author is trying to tell, so she ends up repeating a lot of things and after the second or third time you're told something, you just want to say, "OK, I GET IT!" There are a lot of things that could be edited out to shorten the length and tighten the story without losing the actual plot. Make sure you aren't repeating themes or character actions that only need to be done once.

Second, there are a lot of typos and grammatical errors... this author seriously needs a proofreader, other than herself. Note to ALL authors out there... you can't proofread your own work effectively, because your brain knows what you wanted to write, so that's what it will see. Either read it out loud to yourself so you can hear it (you can catch a LOT of mistakes that way) or hire a proofreader.

Third, there are too many characters, with many of them feeling one dimensional because there is little development. The characters motives and behavior aren't consistent throughout the book and some of the decisions make no sense. The dialogue needs a lot of help, especially since the characters occasionally break the fourth wall as if they are actually speaking to the reader. The author also uses a lot of vocabulary that someone wouldn't normally use in common speech, as if she were in a competition to get the most use out of a thesaurus. Read out loud your dialogue especially, and see if it sounds natural or forced.

This book has promise, however it doesn't live up to it. Unfortunately, I didn't make it through the entire book as the plot seemingly was going no where about halfway through. The blurb on the book page pretty much gives away the story, but it takes way too long and way too many characters to tell it. I would love to see this book after it was fully edited and proofread, and had the story tightened up. I'm not sure where all of the 5 star reviews came from...

NOTE: If changes/corrections are made to this book, as many authors do on kindle releases, I would be happy to re-evaluate the book at that time and update my review and/or star rating to show the changes. But as it is right now, I am unable to give the book a higher rating.

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NOTE to readers on booklikes: I tried to be constructive in my review, however I'd like your opinion since I've had a couple of downvotes... perhaps by the author or her friends, or perhaps random. I included my amazon review link in the source below, so you check check out my review there and mark it as helpful or not if you so desire. If you have a desire to laugh, you can also view the five star reviews on the book.... one which is almost as long as the book!